not going anywhere?

So I've been thinking a lot about friendships.
I think when you're friends with someone it means a lot more than you just hang out with them sometimes. It's a deep caring, trusting relationship. I've learned in these past several days that people who I thought were my friends really don't care about me that much and I can't really trust some of them either. When you're friends with someone, you need to be able to depend on them first of all. If you can't depend on them the relationship is unstable.

I mean if you can't depend on someone, you never know what can happen. You're basically on your own. Like if you do something as little as asking them to do you a favor and you can't depend on them, they may bail on you at any given moment. You can't ask them for anything, not even for them to keep a secret for you. If you can't depend on them, it's really hard to be friends with them unless you just become completely selfless.

Another thing I've realized about friendships is that when something happens,(an argument, a disagreement, an accident, etc.) people tend to cut it off and not fix anything. I guess it seems easier to most people. Anyways, I hate that.I mean what's the point in having a friendship if you have to constantly worry about them dropping everything and leaving because things get a little hard? It's tempting, I know. I don't think a friendship is really a friendship if you always have to convince them that they should keep being friends with you. It just seems a little ridiculous. I hate having friendships that are threatened like that.

I think what it all comes down to is some stuff that I've heard Dennis talk about a lot. Each person needs to deny themselves and pick up their cross. It's not a 50\50 thing. Each person gives 100%. Maybe this is why the saying goes, "A good friend is hard to find."

I guess I just end with wondering what happened to, "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."